After spending the month of August, traveling and working regularly, I expected to return home full of momentum and able to realize the many ideas that had occurred to me on the road.
But like The Path of True Love, the journey of spiritual growth never did run smooth and instead I’ve ended up, as a good friend would say, returning to my “temple”: that place of quiet and contemplation in which I am not the projector but the receiver.
What I’ve received is surprise after surprise in the form of guidance to examine some of my own most deeply held – and previously unexamined – beliefs. These have included beliefs about my purpose, the world, what’s right, what’s wrong, what’s good, what’s bad, and who I think I am that identifies so strongly with those beliefs and convictions.
Some of you may recognize a bit of Byron Katie’s process, The Work, in all this. For instance, I’ve always assumed it was my job to make a difference in the world, to ease suffering and lessen pain. But once one begins to questions whether it is even TRUE that a difference needs to be made, suffering needs to be eased, or pain to be lessened, things can start to unravel pretty quickly.
At times, the unraveling has left me feeling as if I’m on the verge of a total crack-up. But mostly it’s been a peaceful unwinding. Such is the path of devotion and surrender and, having given it some practice and learned some hard lessons in the past from NOT surrendering, I have been able to let go of a lot.
That said, my most recent guidance has still thrown me for a loop:
It is time for me to end this stage of my practice as an intuitive.
As of next week, I will no longer be taking new clients.
What follows this “hiatus” I can’t say – though it is clear to me that sometimes we have to let go of one life/identity/mission in order to fully move on to the next.